The recent encounter with people who took exception to some of my December posts has had a more salutory effect than they would have expected.
It was an important anniversary for me to have been LM for four years. It felt like an achievement against the odds, certainly worth a post. But what was the real point of that photo gallery showing gradual changes in my appearance? I quite see how it could look narcissistic, rather than a celebration of progress. It was me, me, me - excusable in year one, inappropriate in year four. The post about drinking was also unnecessary. It was the stuff of self-appointed gurus. Written for a social group that needed no such advice, and probably wouldn't want it from someone they'd now regard as part of the ordinary world, someone who had moved on. And I was indeed suggesting things that reinforced artificial stereotypes. I really should have known better.
These posts were taken down a few days ago. I think it was the best thing to do. They were not seen as harmless. They had the potential to cause a war of words. Although it's fine and OK to describe what one gets up to and believes in, it's not fine and OK to push it at people as if one is an expert. That's irritating, and can be provocative.
Besides, the perceived provocation could end up damaging innocent people. There is, for instance, the other girl in the UK who is also called Lucy Melford, the one who is on Facebook: I wouldn't want her bothered by a deluge of critical messages from people who thought she was me.
Finally, these posts did not represent the sort of writing that I want to develop in 2013. They were a product of having too much time on my hands over Christmas. Lesson learned, I think.
It was an important anniversary for me to have been LM for four years. It felt like an achievement against the odds, certainly worth a post. But what was the real point of that photo gallery showing gradual changes in my appearance? I quite see how it could look narcissistic, rather than a celebration of progress. It was me, me, me - excusable in year one, inappropriate in year four. The post about drinking was also unnecessary. It was the stuff of self-appointed gurus. Written for a social group that needed no such advice, and probably wouldn't want it from someone they'd now regard as part of the ordinary world, someone who had moved on. And I was indeed suggesting things that reinforced artificial stereotypes. I really should have known better.
These posts were taken down a few days ago. I think it was the best thing to do. They were not seen as harmless. They had the potential to cause a war of words. Although it's fine and OK to describe what one gets up to and believes in, it's not fine and OK to push it at people as if one is an expert. That's irritating, and can be provocative.
Besides, the perceived provocation could end up damaging innocent people. There is, for instance, the other girl in the UK who is also called Lucy Melford, the one who is on Facebook: I wouldn't want her bothered by a deluge of critical messages from people who thought she was me.
Finally, these posts did not represent the sort of writing that I want to develop in 2013. They were a product of having too much time on my hands over Christmas. Lesson learned, I think.